Speedy Willie

Brief Update on Interior Efforts

Much work was completed Wednesday on the interior of Speedy Willie. 

The journey south to Rockdale, Illinois was a treacherous one, featuring emergency stops, emergency swerves, and emergency response!  The emergency stop was the result of an ill-timed yellow light in the middle of a 50 MPH zone, which are always killers. 

The emergency swerve was required when a band of asphalt laborers sprung from a shadowy ditch alongside Ridge Road in unincorporated Grundy County.  If you check Wikipedia, the demographics for Grundy County are made up mostly of asphalt laborers, so I guess I shouldn't have been that surprised.  That and amateur race car drivers. 

Emergency response was not called, though it probably should have been!  There was rust in eyes, sparks flying everywhere, and a potential four alarm blazes around every corner.  Luckily, disaster was averted.  God truly is smiling on us.

Anyways, it took about a half hour to get all the seats removed from Willie's belly, and that is when the engineering began.  I had my attache case with me and promptly retrieved all of the tricks of the proverbial trade.  Sharpened Pencil.  T-Square.  Graph Paper.  Plumb Bob.  Theodolite.  You know what I'm talking about.

Three and a half hours later, we had ourselves a brand new seating configuration.  There is much work to be done in the coming weeks, but we've taken the first, key steps. 

And I learned how to handle a MIG welder.  It looked hard, but you know how a couple of frosty Miller Lites builds a young man's confidence!  I'm kidding.  Kind of. 

Week 3 Recap

...And the Emmy for the Best Supporting Actors in a Comedy, Musical or Variety Show goes to the Chicago Bears, for their role in the "Brian Griese Promotional Hall of Fame DVD." 

 If you watched the game yesterday, you'll recognize much of the aforementioned DVD was taped September 21st in Chicago, IL.  And I'm going to guess that title would fall into the Variety Show category?

Hey,  just because the game was terrible, doesn't mean the events surrounding the game had to be, right?  Especially with such a great parking space!   The well publicized purchase of 5 cases of beer was barely enough to satiate the swelled mass of Bear Fan during the crucial 4th quarter and overtime periods.  Chicago Police Department representatives estimated the crowd gathered around Speedy Willie's television monitor at well over 40 cheering/groaning fans. 

Many in the crowd were stunned by the excellent picture provided by the 26" off-brand LCD television.  When asked how we were provided such reception, Anthony succinctly explained, "Sears Tower," and pointed towards the iconic structure to our northwest.  (Others groused* about how loud the generator was.)

In other news, it should be no surprise we made many new friends during the pre- and post-game festivities.  Most were older fellahs, interested in discussing older fellah related topics... But some were not!  Just above, you'll see we were able to snap off a picture with a couple of young ladies that appear to be on holiday from University.  

The tailgate wound down and many continued they're celebration at West End.  That establishment must have been thrilled to see Speedy Willie pull up and empty a dozen bears fans at it's front door.  Hopefully the waitstaff was tipped well, for what must have been a brutal afternoon shift.

This all should have been completed earlier in the week, but it's been a busy week.

*Groused was today's "Grandma Word of the Day."

Speedy Willie To Replace Van on Scooby Doo

At the completion of the NFL's first fortnight, the news is not good.  The DJIA took a massive hit on the news that Ed Hochuli is fallable.  Futures in San Diego Charger are dropping like "Trading Places."  And other teams look good, like the Bills, Patriots, Jets, & Dolphins.  The AFC East is looking real good.

The Chicago Bear have not had the easiest go of it thus far, with the winning and the losing.  Last week's game was winnable, had it not been for all those injuries at the beginning of Rex's career.  If he could have only stayed healthy and on the field long enough to really grow as a quarterback. 

Yeah...  Had we won SBXLI, Rex's confidence would have remained high, and last year we likely would have made it deep into the playoffs.  Had all that happened, Rex would have been our starting quarterback against Carolina last week and he would have connected with his receivers down field, unlike Kyle Orton.  Then we would have won, and been 2-0 heading into the home opener. 

That aside, the game at this point is secondary.  Focus has been turned to Speedy Willie preparation.  The remaining exterior work has been completed, the brakes have been upgraded, and the supplies have been acquired.  The countdown to Sunday  has begun. 

We'll be there early, so if you're in the neighborhood please stop by.  All are welcome, though you may want to bring enough food / beverage for you and yours.  Certainly everyone cannot be accounted for during grocery shopping.  Look for us in the South lot, at the base of the dueling monster flag poles, the big orange bus, wrapped in bunting. 

And finally, in 2009 news, hours of negotiations have resulted in an agreement on the name of The Cassata's next short bus.  Pending the sale of "Speedy Willie," next year's model will be named "Flipper Anderson."

Thank you very much for spending a couple of minutes here at Speedy Willie dot org.  We know you've many options when it comes to staring at the internet, and we're proud that you've chosen us.  God bless. 

Willie Speedy- Not So Stoppy.

I don't have much in the way of content for an update today, but I came up with that headline and couldn't waste the gold.  It's awful, I know, but it's kind of funny, right?

Anyways, Speedy Willie's ability to stop has come under some harsh criticism of late.  After close examination of his braking components, it was discovered that we have a couple of problems.  One can be fixed by our repair staff, one that cannot. 

So... I talked to Sparky, proprietor of the eponymous auto repair shop down the block from the current parking spot.  I'm going down there tonight after work to drop off the keys to have the steel brake line replaced.  I'm willing to pay this guy up to $60 to get it done.  Considering the part probably costs less than a Chocolate Fudge Frosty, $58 in labor charges seems reasonable.   

Then, once the vehicle can hold down it's brake fluid, Speedy Willie will be transported to beautiful, historic, Rockdale, Illinois!  Home of such attractions as a landfill, power plant, and Syl's Steakhouse, Rockdale truly lives up to it's reputation as a puffed out, bruised ankle on the lower leg of the Des Plaines River.

Once there, it will be coated in SaranWrap to ensure the local miasma* doesn't do permanent damage to the exterior of SW.  Next, the rotors & brake pads will be replaced, and we should be in good shape for the home opener. 

We will refocus our efforts on the interior of the vehicle after week 3.  I am having a hard time coming to terms with how far my original plans were from reality, as the seats are way smaller than I depicted, and so is the bus for that matter.  It's fine, I'm not giving up.

Oh, and the Bears won yesterday which immediately gives this team a bit more credibility.  We'll see how it goes, though.  In an effort to not have my heart broken again, I will remain emotionally detached for the next 3 weeks.  At least.

*Admittedly, Ifound the word 'miasma' in the thesaurus, and I may not have used it correctly.   Definition: a vaporous exhalation formerly believed to cause disease; also : a heavy vaporous emanation or atmosphere.  Seems right, right?

In conclusion, Go Bears! And good night.

Extreme Makeover: Speedy Willie Edition

We have all been truly blessed with the work Dave did on the exterior of the vehicle.  Once it is completed, we may have to talk to whatever governing body handles the classifications for the 8 Wonders of the Modern World. 

We will, however, need to put on our praying gloves when it comes to the interior of Speedy Willie.  At this point, I've secured the services of an excellent man to assist with these makeover efforts.  I've done some quick renderings of the interior of the vehicle, so please forgive me if my lack of attention to detail.  Here's the first (left).

As you can see, there are three rows of full seating accompanied by one row of half seats.  Now we've already removed the rear two seats on the right side for storage, but we will likely re-install the full seat for the final layout. 

Behold.  (right.)

This is what I've been dreaming of for the last two months.  In the updated layout, you'll see I created a dueling booth-style seating arrangement featuring narrow high-boy table/shelves with in-laid cup holders.  Further, the standard issue black/rusty flooring has been replaced with inexpensive garage flooring in the colors of white & blue.  This will hold up to the wear and tear and double as the dance floor, requested by Anthony. 

The exact location of the disco ball and roller light will be determined at some point in the future.  Of course we will have to take into account head space and other factors.  At the rear of Speedy will be room for multi-level shelving on each side, which should provide us with more space than we could possibly need in conjunction with the area under the seats. 

Please review these designs, and provide feedback in the comments section.  I am sure my plans will hold up to the most detailed analysis.